AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Haha, when I was a kid I used to go to some special event where I got to see Trenton Thunder play a game and then camp out in the outfield overnight. It was pretty fun, but I'm still no fan of baseball.

Sure thing! Marcato VS Kira for prettiest lady. FIGHT

Hahaha oh god I will never be a prettier lady than Kira.

Although I did go to K-Mart today because I was walking to work, got there more than a half hour early, and there was nothing better to do, and I was walking through the women's section. I saw some stuff I thought I'd like and I'd look hella cute in if I was a girl. Then there was this Betty Boop shirt and I didn't like that because I'm not a basic bitch.

bodaciously just thought without hesitation.

I always get surprised when I hear that someone went to KMart. Not surprised that they exist, no! (there is one in every town I've been to, even my shitty rural one)
But surprised that someone went to one - I never hear someone say "You won't BELIEVE what I got at KMart today".

Also you made an excellent choice. Nobody has ever seen someone wearing a Betty Boop shirt with a sassy phrase on it and gone "Hot daisies, I want her".

To be fair I only went in there because it's close to my work. It's the shittiest big name store we have in town. I can't believe it's actually worse than Wal-Mart. Yes really.

I've never tried on women's clothing though. I might do that at some point once I'm out of my parent's house.

This is COMPLETELY unrelated to the topic in general but the hierarchy is Target is above Walmart is above KMart. This is universal, from what I have seen and heard.

I feel less terrible about myself this morning. Still not very sure of myself, but I definitely feel more comfortable about questioning myself after getting positive feedback from everyone.

This is rad Princess Marcy, you are rad.

Major guts to even admit it to anyone else.

Follow you dreams girl(maybe).

I told one of my friends from Arizona about what's going on with me, and he was totally cool about it. I didn't even know until just now, but he's female-to-male transgender. Not that he wouldn't have supported me if he wasn't, but I feel 100000000000000000000x better knowing that I have a friend I can physically talk to who's gone through a similar experience.

Edit: Also I didn't really mean to turn this into a daily blog, but whatever, haha.

Sounds like telling someone turned out really well for you! I doubt it could have turned out better, really!

It's nice that you're keeping us updated, unlike someonekiraelse.

If youre confused about your gender identification, just thought you ought to know that its totally okay for guys to be feminine, and women to be masculine. After all, both expressions of the soul are human.

Just have a clear line of who you are and who youre not, and what boundaries youre willing to step over, and you should be pretty okay.

Oh, yeah, I totally get that, and I appreciate the advice. I guess what I'm trying to determine now is whether I'm more comfortable identifying as male or female, as well as what to do with that information once I have it.

And also I honestly want to be sure with myself that my decision is for the right reasons. I definitely feel the way that I do about enjoying the feeling of femininity, but at the same time, I can't say I entirely trust myself, which may be irrational. I sometimes wonder if this is all just because I'm lonely or stressed or looking for attention or trying to get back at my parents for being awful people. That's my main hesitation about saying that I'm totally, 100% transgender. I definitely don't WANT to feel like I could possibly be lying to myself, but it's just a constant nagging at the back of my mind.

I think the best way to try to come to terms with the feelings you're having is to kinda explore why you feel you might be feeling them. Maybe ask yourself questions like "what things about myself do I consider feminine?" or "Do I feel comfortable identifying as a female/uncomfortable identifying as a male?" I think gender can be a very fluid thing, so I wouldn't stress too much about trying to label yourself in a hard and fast manner!

We're only told about the gender binary, but I don't believe it works quite like that. Many think that there is a gender scale, Marcato, so it's also fine if you "mostly" feel like a woman too and not "100%". I know it's comfortable to be able to put a clear word, a clear line on what and how you feel, because then it clears your mind, but don't be afraid to call yourself a woman even if you still feel "kind of" male, y'know?
Whatever you find out about yourself and your identity, I'll be glad to read about it and I'll be pop flyin' that you managed to know yourself better.

You guys are all really so sweet for helping me like this and offering your advice and support. Thank you all, sincerely. I've definitely been given a lot to think about and consider, so even if I don't have an aha moment right away or something like that, it really is helping me sort out my feelings, and I really do appreciate it.

genders are confusing and weird and i have chosen not to have one. they call me.......................................... agender

it's important to explore your identity and find out what feels right. even if you're wrong about being female you're always taking steps in the right direction. don't be afraid to be wrong and don't be afraid to keep trying to pinpoint your identity, anyone who has a problem with that never supported or understood in the first place.

surgery isn't mandatory and i know many women who haven't had any adjustments made to their bodies because they never felt it necessary. you're no less of a woman and no matter what bits you have, they're lady bits because they're your bits and you're a lady. ya dig?

coming out is so difficult but you couldn't have chosen a better community, you'll get nothing but love here no matter what your identity ends up being. you do you and we'll be proud of you.