AWKWARD ZOMBIE

I hate istting on a warm toilet seat. It makes me feel like I'm sharing butt germs with somebody.

only because you are

I never poop in public restrooms for that reason.
Also sometimes my weewee touches the toilet seat when i sit. :c

This morning I was constipated with spicier than hell shit.

That isn't fucking fair.

You will actually get haemorrhoids from heated toilet seats.

People have bodaciously spicy shit? I've never had that and I eat spicy food all the time, my colon must be made of steel.

i am seriously wondering how you know your shit is spicy.

i sincerely hope you just mean it burns your asshole.

You've never had firey shis Syo? It legitamately burns, like eating spicy food.
And sometimes your anus will burn for hours.

Yesss.

Also, I've only taken a shit in a public restroom once. I was sick at the community college, and I was waiting for Tuxedo Mask to leave class and drive me home. I found a kinda out of the way restroom that nobody uses. It was early in the day so it was clean and unused so far, because all the urinals and toilets still had the blue stuff in it.

I was glad I was alone because that was the smelliest shit ever.

I like spicy shit.
Makes me feel alive.

it burns so good.

Feels good, man.

Hole new meaning to "fire in the hole" eh?

Thunder down under.