AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Granted, but it's all you care about

I wish ice cream didn't melt so fast but didn't stay completely frozen

Granted, but it explodes instead.

I wish my toe didn't hurt for no reason.

Granted, but it now hurts because you were wearing heels (you strange person)

I wish everybody cared

Girls wear heels

Also, granted, but then everybody goes back to not caring.

I wish my hair would dry already.

NO THEY DON'T
I thought you were not a girl when I typed that (this stuff happens a lot to me)

Granted, but it's in a funny and unmovable shape

I wish some of these things were actually funny

Whyyy does everyone think I'm a boy I am so confused

Granted, now everything is funny. And you never stop laughing.

I wish people would stop thinking I was a boy.

Maybe you just act so manly

Granted, now people think you're a upstanding member of society

I wish I was an Oscar Meyer wiener ! :awesome:

I'm not manly ;A;

Granted, but instead you're just Oscar Meyer's weiner.

I wish I hadn't said that.

Granted. You said "it" instead, and the Knight who formerly said Ni kill you to death.

I wish that I knew C++.

Granted, now everyone wants you to program them stuff.



I wish I had some Nachos.

Granted, but they are the worst nachos ever, and made of wax and corn syrup

I wish motives weren't as oft misinterpreted.

Granted, but now everyone knows when you're lying.

I wish I was back to being internet famous.

Granted, but you become so famous that you are killed by a stalker.

I wish I was loved

Granted, but it's opposite day so everyone hates you.

I wish I didn't do that really fucking stupid thing that I just did.

Granted. Instead of having just done it, you did it a long time ago. Its spread through word of mouth so much that EVERYONE remembers what you did.

I wish I had a 12 inch pianist.