AWKWARD ZOMBIE

BUT THEN IT BECOMES A MAJOR STUDY ASIGNMENT POSTED BY THE NEWFOUND KING OF THE WORLD AND YOU DIE IF YOU FAIL.

I WISH I KNEW THAT THE PEPSI I DRANK LAST NIGHT HAD ALCOHOL IN IT AND NOW I WOULDN'T HAVE SUCH A FUCKING MASSIVE HANGOVER

Granted, but instead of alcohol, it had Acid dissolved in it and now the PANK Elephants won't stop killing your car with fire.

I wish it only snowed on the roads.

Granted, but it has really crappy graphics. ( ;__; )

I wish I had a table for my gayass sewing machine.

Granted, but all characters have been replacd by Characters from Twilight and Reality TV.

I wish I had time to finish watching Baccano.

Granted, but the rest of it really sucked.

I wish I had 1 million dollars

Granted, but you spend it on shit

I wish I can run

Granted, but you run into a tree

I wish that people weren't assholes

Granted, but people are now dicks.

I wish my penis functioned properly.

GRanted, but now you have an errection all the time, that if you don't beat off every half hour, it will kill you.

I wish I could see into the past.

Granted but then you see a cult doing some terrible terrible things that you can never unwatch ever again. You then proceed to tear your eyes out.

I wish I could beat this stupid ghost gym leader in Pokemon Pearl already.

Granted. You never beat the next leader though.

I wish I was dictator of the universe.

Granted, but you get overthrown and killed


I wish upon a star

Granted, but it's really BANANA being the Dictator of the Universe, and you get killed for suporting them.

I wish I had a Kilt.

Granted. But it's made of paper.

I wish I could play every musical instrument that ever existed.

Granted, but then no one wants to hear music, so they cut off your hands.

I wish I could be on Captain Kirk's crew.