AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Granted, but a group of terrorists bombs your home.

I wish Adobe's programs were cheaper.

Granted. But as the price goes down, so does the quality of the product.

I wish I knew how to work a computer terminal.

Granted but Y2K happens.

I wish everybody knew that everything comes down to poo.

Granted. It's raining poo.

I wish I had a blu-ray player.

Greanted. It shoots blue Rays at you. Blue RADITION rays.

I wish I could Play Diddy Kong in Brawl as well as I play the Ice Climbers.

Granted, but your Wii gets broken.

I wish I had Illustrator.

Granted. But at the cost of losing your drawing abilities.



I wish I hadn't eaten so many nachos...

Granted, but you can never eat nachos again.

I wish I was as good at writing as I used to be.

Granted. You've been sent back in time.

I wish I could find something to do.

Granted. You're here aren't you?
I wish I could make my game a huge succes.

Granted. Your game is such a huge success people just stop playing other games. Some people are unhappy about this. Very unhappy. EA in particular has taken a strong dislike to this development. They decide to hire a "professional" to make sure you are "unable" to create another huge success. You sit, working at your computer, unaware of the events about to unfold. Suddenly, a bang. You see blood, then feel excruciating pain. You clutch your arm and duck for cover. You had a feeling something like this would happen, but never truly expected it. You try desperately to get away, but to no avail. The bullet smashes through a nearby window as it makes its way to you. It hits. You fall over, bleeding, with shattered glass scattered all over the floor around you. You soon die from the wounds.

(I was really, really bored, okay?)

I wish I was less bored.

Granted. You're now falling out of the sky. Ooh. Exciting.

I wish there was something decent on TV.

Granted but you have to watch it over and over and over and over...

I wish I had remembered to buy toilet paper. (don't ask)

Granted. You buy one roll, along with four packages of Hot Pockets and lots of beans.

I wish I could play the violin and that my arms/hands wouldn't fall off and I wouldn't go blind or anything.

You can play it but nobody likes the violin anymore baww

I wish I knew why my avatar is gone