AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Well for one, don't react to it.

Otherwise, well, it's just something you have to put up with, weather you want it or not. can't tell people not to find you attractive.

weather

Well, I figured I wouldn't be able to get rid of it completely.

I guess my real question is how to get them to stop being so.....aggressive about it.

do friendships count as relationships i can get advice for

Why not?

Sweet Jesus in heaven be merciful upon me
(No I do this all the time thank you for correcting me I'll never learn)

But uh, if it gets to the point where it is making you feel violated/uncomfortable, that's when you have to get vocal and tell them to tone it down.

And yeah IO most definitely

Well, it's like this. There's a girl that I've talked to bodaciously twice. She's already asking me to go to karaoke night with her. Alone. At a restaurant.

i had a friend i met about a year ago and we became pals and eventually i came to think of him as one of my very best friends, along with Odds and Bacon and Dirges.

But a few months ago he met some kid at a con, now they're obsessed with each other and taking their cosplay personas way too seriously and

now my friend is just a completely different person. Just a few months ago we could talk for hours and hours and hours about absolutely nothing and now i have to pull teeth just to get him to talk to me. And without getting into more personal stuff, he just stopped caring about my issues and sometimes even his own(i worry about him a lot because he doesn't take care of himself) in favor of... everything else. He's just kind of an asshole now and i hate how he makes me feel. I've confronted him about it, but he always pulls every excuse under the sun out of his booty as to why his shitty friend-ness isn't his fault.

I'm still friends with him because i keep hoping that this is just a phase and it'll pass and he'll be my friend again, and because several months ago, he promised and swore up and down that he'd never abandon me and never forget about me, like all the other friends i've had since childhood have done to me. But now he is, and it hurts, and i don't know what to do.

edit: i’m juust tired of crying all the time and crying so much i make myself sick and vomit, but i don't want to lose the chance that my friend might still be there underneath this asshole he's become

I know this may be hard for you, considering he's been a friend for a long time, but you need to consider what's in your best interest. If you've tried telling him how you feel, and he won't listen, maybe it's time to let go and find a friend that treats you better.

Well the thing you have to remember, m'dear, is that you can't always hold someone accountable for what they may have said months ago, even if it was a sworn promise. Times change people, and so do circumstances. People go from one friend to the other sometimes, and the ones they leave behind get either excuses or straight up ignored. It's happened to me with friends a lot, but I've always been lucky enough to make new friends (considering that it seems to come hard to other people.)
I wouldn't say that you should cut this guy out of your life or anything, but maybe while he's off doing his own thing, you should just sort of keep the friendship "on hold" as it were until he decides that he wants to contribute to it. It does suck that people tend to change and grow distant, but sometimes you gotta just roll with the punches.

And Marcato, this kinda just sounds like a typical curiosity to me. She is interested in you it seems, and would like to maybe go out with you and get to know you. If you find that you like the idea of this, maybe take her up on the offer. If not, well then just say no thanks and there ya go. Seems like a normal advance to me.

This person is no good for you right now, IO; Let him go.

Trying to keep the friendship there is obviously having a detrimental effect on you; I think it would be better to allow both of you to go your separate ways - as painful as the thought of that might be (I think when you resign yourself to ending this you'll actually feel much better).

To me it seems as though trying to keep the friendship alive is causing just as much pain.

Let him go.


He's not worth crying or making yourself sick over.

I know. It's just hard to do it, especially since, back when he was still not an asshole, he's talked me down from self-harm and used to always be there when i really needed him, and even when i didn't and just wanted to chat.

I just wish he was still that awesome person. Now he won't even respond to me when i really, really need him and i'm feeling like i'm on the edge and i need help because he's too fucking busy being the "bro" to some bratty "dave"


also, vaxidd, the "on hold" thing has kinda been what's already going on. he just doesn't respond to me anymore beyond "yo" "mhm" "ehehe" "i'm busy"

i just want my friend back. he was unique and funny and creative and talented and helpful and kind

and now he's none of those things


i don't know how to break it off

I understand what you're saying, but I don't think I'm explaining myself very well, which is my bad.

Here, let me put it this way:

Her: "You should come to karaoke with me."
Me: "I'll have to see how my schedule looks."
Her: "I'll sing with you if that makes you more comfortable."
Me: "Uh...."

IO: It's apparent that your options are continue to be miserable over this or move on. Sorry if that was harsh, but that's how it is.

I don't know if you see this kid/guy every day, IO, but I don't think you really have to tell him verbally that you don't want to have anything to do with him anymore.

Just keep your distance from him and focus your attention on other people.

Sure, keep it civilised and say "Hi." to him from time to time (if you want), but leave it at that.

I agree with DND. Didn't mean to imply that you should totally ignore him forever.