AWKWARD ZOMBIE

This overlaps with the dream thread a bit, but only if people choose to talk about it.

What kinds of things do you guys see in your own subconscious and character? When you have nightmares/good dreams, upon reflection, what realistic fears/desires do they reflect, and how do you know? Are the scariest/best parts of a dream literal (I wish I could find a dragon hatchling in a supermarket) or symbolic (I wish my dreams were easier to obtain)?

Other stuff, too, though, not just dreams.

Some people I know see an image or pattern when their eyes are closed too hard, or the blood rushes from their head while standing. When I rub my eyes, I see shifting patterns of letters in a grid like a crossword, almost-- like tiny, tiny tiles full of letters, all over the insides of my eyes. My mother sees flowers. Does anybody else have something like that? NOTE: do NOT press too hard on your eyes just to try to make it happen, that can hurt you really badly. LIGHT pressure from the heels of your hands over your closed eyes can sometimes make it happen. For me, there's a brief sensation of disorientation, a lot of white/grey soft "static" and then the letters in boxes.

Or things like characters you idolize. Why? What about them makes them so desirable and likeable and what does that say about you?

I don't know AZ, I'm sleep drunk and exhausted, but I'm definitely curious about the images thing.

when my eyes are pressed against, i see cathedrals

This is probably a sign that I work too much but... sometimes I see co workers in my peripheral vision.

In regards to dreams mine are usually pretty forgettable for being very mundane, usually about work or high school. Sometimes I have epic movie dreams.

I used to have a lot of morbid dreams about people dying, about killing people or being killed, about burying dead children or being trapped with their bodies. I haven't had dreams like that in a while so I'm not sure what that says about the person I was back then.

When I was younger and closed my eyes I would see some kind of tunnel. Think of the Opening of Doctor Who where the TARDIS flies through. That was long before I even knew what Doctor Who was.


And dreams... I don't have nightmares. Which is pretty interesting psychologically I assume. Every time I have a dream that would be a nightmare for other people, my me in the dream somehow turns the tables around, fights the monster, saves the people, whatever the setting is. I haven't had a bad nightmare in years.

I'm the same with the nightmares and the turning the tables.

One oddity about my subconscious mind versus conscious is it really likes to have girls be naked. They don't do anything different, don't try to tempt me or anything, they're just in the buff and doing whatever. I don't even notice them in the dreams specially; it seems normal at the time.

Okay I seriously was not expecting this to happen but when I just now pressed against my eyes I saw slowly strobing, waving bands of green and blue light that looked exactly like Aurora Borealis floating through the darkness

Holy shit that was cool

Usually about at least once a year I have a tornado dream and a tsunami dream, both of which tend to be fairly similar to each other. Most of the time my dreams don't bother me but both of those do upset me a lot. The tornado dreams I understand since they were a big threat where I grew up, but idk why I have tsunami dreams too.

Also with that eyes thing I always see a yellow pattern that looks kinda like rushing car headlights

Huh, I have the same thing with nightmares too.

Yeah, it's really weird, right? And it actually appears as a visual phenomena, like, something you perceive as actual sight. Not everybody seems to see anything and I dunno that it's like, some kind of ultra important thing that means anything really, but it's pretty interesting that people who do see something all seem to see something different. I sometimes see a distinct, extremely blue particle effect, but it's almost always the letters.

Also, my nightmares are rarely actually about what's going on-- they're about psychological fears I have. It's never getting killed or fighting monsters that's the frightening part of the dream.

As far as recurring dreams, though, I mentioned it years ago in the dream thread, but there's a recurring dream I have about an extremely specific house. All the women in my family have recurring dreams about houses unique to them, too-- for example, my mom's is permanently under construction, and to get from one side to the other you have to balance high aboveground on rickety, thin planks.

I plan to write a story some time soon about mine as a setting, just because.

Oh recurring dreams. They're weird. For me, while I dream and shortly thereafter I know that it is something I've dreamt of before and it is like another episode in a series, and they tend to be halfway lucid dreams too. Afterwards though I stop remembering them like any other dream.

Let's see, I have a lot of these. Whenever I'm stressed out, I "hear" various voices saying my name. Sometimes it's voices I know, sometimes not, and it varies from people saying like "Hey Saint, come look at this real quick" to "SAAAAAINT NO DON'T DIE ON ME" or "Saint! Get over here so I can beat the crap out of you!" and everything in between, except all they really say is my name. They tend to be more aggressive/desperate the more stressed I am. The only common factor between all the tones of voice is that they all seem to need something from me, whether its my attention or effort or what have you.

When I was younger, I used to rub my eyes so hard that I would see black and gold patterns everywhere, and sometimes they looked like pineapples, or Hawaiian shirt patterns, or stripes. I don't do that anymore though 'cause it's bad for the eyes.

Also, I like to imagine that I have superpowers in my spare time, OR that some huge event happens where everyone has superpowers, or certain people do. And by "superpowers" I just mean anything supernatural. One scenario that happens a lot is one where everybody basically becomes a half-animal based on their spirit animal or whatever; another is where everyone becomes an element-bender like in the Avatar series; another is where everyone gets a single Pokemon, the list goes on. As you can see it's pretty influenced by media... I know the animal thing is from some book I read a long time ago where there were bird people, snake people, lion people, etc. I usually go pretty in depth with these scenarios too, like what would happen to society and stuff.

I can't play Patapon because the music would seep into my mind.

Worse than stuck in my head. It was actually playing.

When I'm in the middle of a dream or nightmare, my mind can conjore a sort of mental keyboard, or a power button that will wake me up automatically.

I can distinguish whom a person is by the sound of there footsteps.

When I was younger(and still do this) older people would start talking to me about an importaint task they had to do, I'd always mention something that would happen around 5 minutes later. An example is a few summers ago I was at my aunts cottage, and my cousin had broke his wrist or had a cut that got infected, but he had to wear a glove to be able to swim. I had gotten my period and left my pads at the cottage, and an aunt had to drive me back to the cottage to pick some up. As we were leaving I ... well um its hard to explain, since I wasnt actully thinking about saying it, but it just blurted out that my cousin will need more gloves. My aunt sort of shrugged it off, but 5 minutes later she got a phone call from another aunt about how she needed us to pick up more gloves for my cousin.
Apparently I've done this a hole lot, and it freaked out my parents all the time.

I also have dreams where I'm about to start having a nightmare, but I have a sort of special dream guardian that comes and is like NOPE NOT GUNNA HAPPEN, so I havent had any nightmares in a while.

Theres also stuff about fairys and ghosts I can mention but I think people will just shrug it off and go OH WILLWOW U SO CRAY CRAY

I don't know that this is a tic or something that would go in that thread, but certain textures make me cringe. Like, actually just come across as disgusting to me somehow-- for example, the way loosely woven yarn feels against teeth. Oh god it's making my skin crawl.

Also, I don't know that I'd describe as it synaesthesia, but visual letters all have very specific feelings that are like mental textures I associate with the way they "feel" in my mouth, and it makes me extremely partial to certain kinds of word choice. It's probably directly related to a lot of people thinking my poetry is nice in the same way people with real synaesthesia are often aided in what they do by whatever it is they have going on. Like it's hard to describe, visual letters are just really important to me and I often prefer communicating in text over communicating out loud partly for that reason. It just feels extremely natural to me.

I have this continuous tone in my head that has always been there as long as I can remember. It honestly doesn't sound like anything I've ever heard before, it's just a continuous tone. If I had to describe it, it sounds sort of like the sort of noise you hear after turning on an old tube TV and tuning to a blank channel (not static but like a blue screen), but as I said this tone is unique and doesn't sound like anything I've ever heard. It seems to change volume depending on background noise. For example if I have music playing then it'll be less noticeable, but in complete silence the tone is nearly deafening and physically uncomfortable. This is why I can never go to sleep unless I have my fan on, because the noise dulls out the tone.

An interesting theory me and my good friend developed about this was that since I was able to hear someone's thoughts when I focused clearly on them (only successfully happened once but I've heard several things while focusing on it, but that's a story for another time), the tone is a sort of "static garble" for this, for lack of a better word, telepathic tendency. It's like I haven't tuned myself to hear the frequency of thought or something. Another interesting thing is that when I focus on the tone itself, it gets just a tad louder, regardless of the background noise.

I'll be waiting for the party van to take me to "a special place"