AWKWARD ZOMBIE

You are Officer Down, patrolling the mean streets of New York, New York. You have your eyes currently set on that awesome S.W.A.T. job that has been left open recently. To reach that level, you will need to prove your WORTH and HEROISM to the people of New York and your POLICING STATION.
Recently, you were patched in by one of your fellow policemen that there is a DOMESTIC DISPUTE in your district. Due to you patrolling on foot, you have been sent ALONE to INVESTIGATE.

The year is 1970.

You do not possess a love interest.

You do not have any work-friends yet.

Your top skill is talking people down and whacking criminal scum with your baton.

You have absolutely no live combat experience.

>Cook socks.

>Roll out in the Downsmobile

>Retrieve arms from safe

>Obligatory MSPA joke.

>Inventory

>an hero

>Get ye flask

Practice martial arts.

Become a Super villain

A sudden craving for socks sweeps over you, but not just any socks. Oh no, these socks must be cooked! You scour the alleyways and streets of your area looking for cooking appliances but alas, there are no chefs willing to help your desire for cooked socks.
This would be all be easily fixed if you had your trusty Downsmobile to roll out in! In retrospect, it was a pretty bad name for your car, but daisies those people who find Down Syndrome laughable! The DOWNSMOBILE IS A FUCKING BEAST
But once again, your Downsmobile is at the repair shop on the other side of town, thanks to you being a shitty cop and just using it to ram it into criminals, ala GTAIV style.

Now, you feel, would be the best time to practice martial arts! You let some kicks into the air and judo chop the next suspicious person you see. You are consequently attacked and knocked out!

--

You wake up in a poorly lit room, strapped to a dentist's chair. You attempt to free yourself only to discover to your absolute horror when your arms are missing! HOLY SHIT WHAT FUCK AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHH
You subsequently flip the fuck out and start to scream like there really ain't no tomorrow.
To your left, however, is a safe. You figure that they might hold your arms. But the question remains, how to get to the safe? Wriggle as you might, you don't seem to do anything to the constraints against you.
To your right is a flask filled with a bubbly liquid. This could only mean one thing...

A SUPER STRENGTH ELIXIR!

You move your head closer to the table, bumping it and knocking the flask onto a tilt, causing it to fall into your mouth. Super strength is gained, you break free of the constraints in half the time it took to write this sentence and you reach the safe.
WHAT THE FUCK IS THE COMBINATION AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGHHHHHH

It would appear a supervillain has trapped you here, because this place is as clean as hell with lasers and shit

>You have a super strength elixir. Just fucking punch through it.

OH YEAH WITH MY ARMS

OH WAIT WHERE ARE THEY

>Retrieve beer kegs in place of arms

this is possibly the worst idea i've ever had, maybe do a king adventure